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Everyone has a different road to recovery, do not compare yourself to anyone else. I suddenly realised that I am writing about complications as if they are obstacles on the route, the point is that this is THE Route for me. It is my journey, good, bad, happy or sad. While there are things to be learnt on the journey and the trail may wander, it will not change. So I do not want you to think geez she had it tough, for me I have gained a lot from the process and this blog is a way of pulling that together. It is my conversation with myself, assessing the journey so far and into the future.

I relish the life I have, I read somewhere the Latin phrase Amor fati, loosely translated it means Love of one’s fate. Without the months of painful attempts of putting a foot In Front of another I would not have the love of walking that I now have. I love the fact I can walk freely in the cold, up an incline and for significant periods of time. A few weeks before this present obstacle I walked to and through the very park that I had failed to even get as far as the entrance for months. The very essence of breathing and walking have been opened up to my mind. How can I see this journey as complications only, as obstacles to be just overcome? I cannot. Instead they are part of the landscape on the road I travel.

To change my heart I need a new genetic history, I would have to have different parents, I do not want that so this is my history. I have beleaguered this point enough!

Let us get back to the tale, at one point the pain was soo bad that the GP had me readmitted to hospital, but two days later they had upped my pain medicines and sent me home. The breathing exercises continued and it seemed as if we were making real progress. All this time another part of the road was changing, while the lungs issue was like an undergrowth that had to be cut back. The new problem was a slow increase in humidity and temperature – the wound. It had continued to give out pus and was recovering slowly. Around it there was intense pain and I began to have severe night sweats.

Pain is not always pain. What does she mean? The implication is that when we move into a long term chronic illness we come so inured to the presence of pain that we do not realise the cause and nature of the pain has changed. We accept that this is the way of things.

So here is my advice keep a record of how you feel, record your temperature before you take paracetamol or other pain relief, when and how many you are taking of the pain killers.  If the trend changes, I was feeling better, now I am worse and its different because

I have night sweats, temperature, pain in my bones, redness, emphasis the new characteristics ignore the old. Doctors are simple souls, this is your life their 10 minute appointment . Make it simple for them, do not gve up, demand help!

Savoury Scones (healthier)

I never see the point of making a small quantity, be greedy or freeze or share. The secret to light scones is do not handle the dough for too long. Scones and soups are my clear the fridge recipes.

500g wholemeal and white flour mixed
1 tablespoon baking powder
1 teaspoon bicarbonate soda
1 teaspoon salt or half
Sieve this lot together.

Now add your herbs and spices, my favourite ingredient is red chilli flakes, I add a tablespoon, but you do what you like. Herbs I use together are:
thyme, parsley and oregano together
Sage with spring or red onions and parsley
Basil with sundried tomatoes and a hint of oregano or lemon rind
Coriander, capsicums, roast garlic, spring onions and maybe cumin

Fresh herbs I use 2-3 tablespoon of each, 2-3 teaspoons dried herbs.
Herbs vary I strength, thyme is bold, parsley is mild so blend carefully to your taste.  Mix  these into the flour.

I use up sour or fresh milk and yoghurt together to about 450 ml. Low fat yoghurt, skimmed milk, but if you are not worried about fat levels, go for it. I have used up all types of old cream, mascarpone and other dairy products. If the are not sour add a tablespoon of lemon juice.

Cheeses
I use a mixture of cheeses I do not stint on low fat cheeses adding a 200 g carton at times but I am much more restrained with the hard cheeses using between 50 -100g depending.
Cottage, ricotta, mozzarella, Parmesan, cheddar, feta,

Add the cheeses to the flour and herb mixture. You do not need butter or oil, trust me if you will eat them quickly, but if they are for keeping add two tablespoon of oil of you choice. I also add seeds sunflower, sesame, poppy a handful will do.

Now add the yoghurt/milk mixture to form a dough a soft dough, do not addit all. Get your hands in there, but if not use a food processor. If it’s too wet do not roll it out just put on to a floured metal tray using a tablespoon and pat them down. Other wise roll cut out place on metal tray ( no need to grease just put a light dusting of flour ). Put in a hot oven at 200C, gasmark 7 for about 15 minutes check them after 10 minutes. Take of tray if the bottom is baked, brown they are done.

Use as rolls, spread with butter, as they are, with chutneys, accompany soups really well.

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